Aids face to face

There are certain times in your life when you know that from that point on it will never be the same.
Finishing year 12, the death of a parent or close friend, the completion of uni. You know in your heart that things will be different.
After my morning at the clinic we went to Kibera. Kibera is another of the 200 slums that make up Nairobi. Worse again than Korogocho it is about 30 times as big and has a 70% positive HIV rate. We were shown around by a group called Hands of Love. These people go into the homes of those with Aids who are in desperate need. I thought after Korogocho I would be a little better prepared, and I was. There was a strench that scorched the air, floating excrement and rubbish where ever you walked. People lived in 3m x 2m huts on a much more primitive scale; made simple out of wood and mud squeezing 5 in the one bed. I was ready for it all, all except that one question.

The two guys from Hands of Love (Rassmusin and Stephen) took us to a ladies home. Built between three converging canals of sewage, with her weak frail body she welcomed the four of us in.
We couldn’t fit properly, but this seemed expected as we positioned for a seat. She laid before us some glass beads that she had made in hope of picking up 100 shillings (equivalent to $1). She was a HIV positive mother of four that had lost her husband in 1998 to HIV. They all lived in the 3m x 3m room sleeping while we sat. After discussing the stigma of HIV for a time it was her turn to ask questions. Without hesitation she directed the first question at me. With a direct gaze she calmly but forcefully spoke in her Swahili tongue as Rassmusin interpreted.

“I am living here in the slum of Kibera with my 4 children with nothing to eat. What is it that you have done in your life to help people like me with HIV?”

I sat a little stunned. That isn’t the type of question that you should ask someone that has come over from Australia to help. However, it was then I realized ‘what have I done?
I started to comment on how my government has provided money for ARV’s and this will in turn allow for cheaper drugs…...but then I realized this was a cop out….so I replied with the honest truth.

“very little”

It is easy to justify yourself and your lack of action/engagement on a issue when you talk to academics or the lay man in the street, “There are plenty of things I am doing, I cannot just help those with HIV, what about others that need help?” But when a HIV +’ve mother asks you can you pay my rent so I won’t get kicked out onto the street with my 4 children you are broken inside, broken for good.